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Maria Connolly, LPC Facebook Facebook Facebook

Category: Self-Leadership Skills

How Changing Your Identity Makes Desired Behaviors & Attitudes Stick

Changing your identity — changing how you perceive yourself — is key to lasting change that transforms your life, because it reveals who you really are.“One of the main reasons we don't stick with habit changes is that we don't tend to the thoughts, beliefs, and words that go along with these actions we so want to change.” ~ Jen Sincero, Author of You Are a Badass

“Little girl, who do you want to be when you grow up?” Often we’re left in no doubt. Little Amy wears her version of nursing scrubs and says, “I’m nurse Amy. You need a shot.” She becomes the person she wants to be by dressing up, play-acting the role, and identifying with stories about nursing. We, also, have this powerful talent for changing our identity, if we know how to reawaken and unleash it. Are you ready to use this super power to  change your life?

Especially now, people are in a transition state. There are things we’re learning about ourselves during the pandemic. Maybe you liked working from home and having more flexibility, but now your boss wants you back in the office 40 hours a week. Are you ready to make the leap into a new career to make that happen?

We often have an idea of what we want to do or who we want to be. We’re told that the way to success is to take new steps to ’start’ or ’try’. However, to change your life and make it stick, do something different! What is it? 

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Setting Personal Boundaries – 5 Steps that Build Strong and Supportive Relationships

Setting personal boundaries takes courage, but in the long run, you’ll be happier and the people in your life will love, respect and appreciate you more.“When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice.” ~ Brené Brown

”If I didn’t do it, it wouldn’t get done!” Have you ever felt like that? It seems like most of the work falls on your shoulders when you have family gatherings. Relationships where you’re the one who does all the giving, while others do all the taking, are exhausting. How can you break this cycle? The answer lies in understanding the importance, and power, of setting personal boundaries. 

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Got a Plan for Personal Growth? Set Intentional Goals for an Optimum Life

You are the captain of your life and a plan for personal growth will get you to your desired destination“One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward growth. Growth must be chosen, again and again, fear must be overcome again and again.” ~ Abraham Maslow

Before any captain sails from port, she has multiple, detailed, and documented plans that include checking each operating system. The Navigator creates a passage plan, (a comprehensive, step-by-step description of how the voyage will proceed from departure to destination) and advises course corrections, as needed, throughout the trip. Every crew member has prepared a mental game plan for any contingency they might meet. If one trip involves this much planning, how much planning do we invest in our lives? Do you have a plan for personal growth, so you can live your optimum life?

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Is Lowering Your Expectations the Way to Less Disappointment & More Happiness?

Lowering our expectations isn’t the best answer. Learn to manage the pain of unmet expectations and assess, then adjust your expectations really works!“People and events don’t disappoint us, our models of reality do. It is my model of reality that determines my happiness or disappointments.” ~ Stephan Zweig

Expectations are powerful. Yet they are often a hidden power, because we expect things, without being aware that we’re doing it. We need to bring our hidden, unhelpful expectations out into the open, so we can let them go before they limit our opportunities and damage our relationships. Then we can create space for helpful expectations that fuel our dreams and keep us motivated. However, lowering your expectations is NOT the answer to dealing with life’s disappointments. Here’s why...

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How to Let Go Of Unrealistic Expectations Before They Destroy Your Happiness

It takes courage to let go of unrealistic expectations, but once you identify them for what they are, as these 7 examples show, it becomes easier.Managing our expectations is one of life’s greatest challenges. Positive expectations can lead to positive results. Too often, however, we make ourselves unhappy because we have unrealistic expectations.

Unrealistic expectations can also have a ripple effect. For example, when you expect the best from someone, you’re more patient and supportive. You invest time and resources in them because you believe it’s worth it. On the other hand, when you expect the worst from someone, you downplay or dismiss their efforts. You don’t invest your emotions in them and you withhold time and attention that could help them do better.

What you expect becomes your reality, because the brain believes what you are thinking. Life is too short to let unrealistic expectations stand in the way of happiness. So from time to time it’s a good idea to assess our expectations and adjust to the way life really is, not the way you wish it to be. Because life isn’t a fairy tale where everything magically has a “happy ever after” ending.

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How to Step Forward to a Future You've Created

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