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Category: Self-Leadership Skills

Being Spontaneous or Predictable — Which Do You Prefer? Do You Yearn For More?

When life is overwhelming, predictability gives stability like an anchor that keeps you from totally losing it.Predictability is safe. Some say it’s boring. Being spontaneous may be scary or thrilling. Predictability or spontaneity — which makes you feel most alive? Or do you need both?

When life is overwhelming, predictability gives stability like an anchor that keeps you from totally losing it. It creates calm in a world of chaos. At times like these, you’re tapping into the benefits of predictability:

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Resolve Internal Conflicts with My NLP Tea Time Exercise

If you’ve ever feel conflicted or indecisive, this NLP Tea Time exercise can help you resolve internal conflicts so your various Parts can act harmoniously.

Ignoring, numbing, or fighting against your feelings isn’t the answer. When you have an internal conflict, the discomfort you feel is a signal that something is important and you need to pay attention! You can make friends with your discomfort, resolve internal conflicts and restore inner peace.  Let me share my secret for how I do it…

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Parts Integration – How to Stop Self-Sabotage and Cultivate Internal Harmony

Use my Tea Time exercise that’s based on NLP Parts Integration Technique to create internal harmony and end inner conflictPart of you wants to, part of you doesn’t  — so you turn an opportunity down because it feels safer…but you then regret that decision. Learn why you experience feelings like these and how Parts Integration Techniques can help you create internal harmony and balance so you never miss out on an opportunity again!

Too often we’re plagued by self-sabotaging behavior. For instance, you want to lose weight but you keep turning to that carton of chocolate ice cream for comfort. Or you want to be a successful manager, but you rub people the wrong way, or unwittingly create drama so you’re always putting out fires.

Self-sabotaging behavior occurs when different “parts” of your self are conflicted. You want success, but a Part of you doesn’t believe you deserve it. You want to be healthy and fit, but a Part of you self-medicates unhealed emotional wounds with comfort food.

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Motivation vs Self-discipline: Don’t Ask, “Which is Better?” Here’s Why You Need Both!

The life you’ll enjoy most is the life you create for yourself. Yes, there’s a trend of people wanting life to be handed to them or thinking the world owes them, but you and I know that attitude doesn’t bring satisfaction or self-fulfillment. We not only need the desire (Motivation) but we need the baby steps forward (Self-discipline) to make life changes happen. Let me say this again… get rid of the motivation vs self-discipline mentality and adopt the motivation AND self-discipline mindset. This puts us in control of our lives. Amazing things happen when we recognize that we’re in the driver’s seat, as Robert Greene noted, 

“It is time to reverse this prejudice against conscious effort and to see the powers we gain through practice and discipline as eminently inspiring and even miraculous.” 

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Allow Yourself to Feel Your Emotions & You’ll Make Emotional Barriers Disappear

When you allow yourself to feel your emotions, you’ll make emotional roadblocks disappear and feel safe and confident as the real you becomes visible.“You’re so emotional!” That’s what my client, Janine, heard throughout her early years. And you know it wasn’t said as a compliment, but rather as a reprimand. From this and other negative judgments, Janine learned that it’s not good to allow yourself to feel your emotions. Her caregivers taught her that some emotions were “unacceptable”. 

To gain approval and protect herself from being hurt, she started bottling up her feelings. Not only did she become good at hiding her emotions from others, she began to hide them from herself… to the point where she didn’t know what she liked or even who she was anymore!

Have you ever experienced anything like Janine? When you were sad were you told, “Oh, don’t be such a baby!” or when you were angry, did they say, “That’s so ugly. No one is going to like you, if you keep that up little Missy.”

We react strongly to emotions we judge as negative. Emotions like grief, sadness, anger, shame, and fear make us uncomfortable and afraid. When we see them in others, it’s unpleasant, so we try to make them go away.

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