Maria Connolly, LPC

Self Leadership – The “Missing Link” to Living an Extraordinary Life

Self leadership means you make intentional choices that help you, your family and business to excel. Here are 7 ways to improve your self leadership skills.When you realize nothing is lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” ~ Lao Tzu

Take a minute to visualize all the people you lead… who do you see? Do you see your child, employees, clients, colleagues? But do you also see yourself? Self leadership is the most important type of leadership there is, yet it’s often ignored.

By leading yourself first, you make intentional choices that help you lead all those other people in your life. If you’re not quite achieving the life you want or if you feel frustrated with the people you are leading, then it’s likely your self leadership could use some attention.

What do I mean that your self leadership skills need work?

Well, if you complain that your husband doesn’t communicate with you, it’s likely your communication skills need work. Or if you feel like your team is always blowing your business budget, perhaps your budgeting skills need work instead. Or if your goals are never completed on schedule, perhaps your time management skills need adjusted.

To fix any issue or problem, you’ll want to first look to see how your own behavior is contributing to it. After all, it’s not fair to ask something from them, if you can’t deliver it yourself. Of course, this doesn’t mean you need to strive for perfection. Rather, take a hint from Jack Kerouac when he said, “Rest and be kind, you don’t have to prove anything.” Make changes to be true to yourself and not to please someone else. When you master self leadership, you model behaviors and traits you want to see in the people around you, and they, in turn, will reflect those behaviors back to you.

No matter what your area of interest is, there are 7 self leadership principles you can apply to obtain greater success…

Embody your purpose. Instead of waiting for “some day”, take steps to start living your dreams today. If you haven’t created a roadmap, vision board, or outline of how you want your life and business to be like, it’s time to do so now. Identify what you want, why you want it, and when you want it. Give yourself as many specific details and time limits as you can. And start taking baby steps toward your dreams.

Practice mindfulness. Self-awareness is essential for identifying your behaviors, beliefs, strengths, and weaknesses. Only then can you make changes that support, not sabotage, the kind of life you wish to live.

Choose personal responsible. Take ownership of your decisions, actions and outcomes. Shifting the blame to someone else isn’t productive. It’s your choice in how you want to be in any given circumstance.

Deepen your emotional intelligence. By managing your emotions, you increase your self-confidence and learn to influence others positively.

Master self-discipline. All aspects of life require self-discipline, if you want to fully live. Getting out of bed, eating healthfully, exercising regularly, being financially responsible, maintaining a productive schedule, to name just a few, take getting tough with yourself, instead of pampering yourself.

Develop systems for life. To move forward, it’s vital to plan the route you wish to travel. This includes goals, life systems and micro-habits that support you in your quest for fulfillment.

Adjust your dials.” Improve the quality of your life by heightening your mindful awareness of actions, thoughts, speech and emotions and how they are, or are not, serving you. When you make small, incremental changes to each area (family, career, physical well-being, spirituality, recreation, etc) or “dial in” your life, you’ll think in terms of creating life-transforming microhabits instead of vague, undefined goals that are unsupportable, like “going on a diet” for example.

Self leadership is all about the actions you take, the beliefs you cultivate, and the attitude you live by. I believe you can nurture and grow the leader within. To do so, I invite you to sign up for my newsletter, so you receive monthly doses of self leadership training. As you implement each suggestion, you’ll start to see tremendous personal and professional growth.

Habits and Routines, Living Fully, Personal Growth - Professional Growth


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