Maria Connolly, LPC

Tag: Personal Growth – Professional Growth

Always Believe in Yourself

Do you always believe in yourself? When you make minor adjustments to these six senses of self, you’ll be able to bring your best to everything you do.Are you a good friend? You accept, value, and appreciate your friend for who she is. You bring out the best in her. You gently encourage her when she feels down. You believe in her even when she’s at her worst. Now, stop and think if you treat yourself that way. Do you always believe in yourself? If you’re like many women, your relationship with self may just be the hardest one for you to believe in and support.

To reach the point where you can always believe in yourself takes intentional work. It’s important to move from judging to observing yourself, from dismissing to celebrating your strengths, from criticizing to gently accepting your limitations, from motivating yourself with “I should” to staying connected with your highest purpose, and from holding back to asking for support.

No matter what stage of life you’re in, you can make minor adjustments to each of these areas and achieve tremendous results. Always believe in yourself and bring your best to everything you do by strengthening your sense of self in the following ways…

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Is Emotional Dependence Holding You Back? Learn to Be Your Own Person & Thrive

We all can transition from emotional dependence to resourceful, self-regulating people by achieving awareness of these basic steps to emotional independence“She needed a hero, so that’s what she became.” ~ unknown

Are you drawn to people who are kind and self-assured? I am! I love being around people who are comfortable in their own skins and who easily interact with other people. You can tell they love people, but you sense that their happiness isn’t dependent on others but comes from within. They’re the embodiment of someone who has successfully grown from youthful emotional dependent to mature emotional independence.

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Not Good Enough? Only You Can Change How You Feel. Here’s How…

When you let “I’m not good enough” drive you, you give your power away and aren’t in charge of your life, so here are tips to help you change that feeling.“We see things not as they are, but as we are.” ~ H.M. Tomlinson

I’m just not good enough” is a phrase I hear from many of my clients. Maybe they don’t use those exact words, but the feeling behind many of their roadblocks can be traced back to whether or not they feel like they measure up in their own minds or in the mind of someone else.

For example, one client said to me, “I’m not happy.” Why? “Because I worked really hard on a session for my client and she didn’t respond well at all.” Is that really your fault? “If I was a better coach, they’d love everything I do.” Is that realistic? “Maybe. Maybe, not. I just feel like I’m not good enough to be a coach.” Bingo!

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Building Resilience by Mindfully Challenging the Status Quo

When your commitment and resolve are tested, building resilience is the one thing that will keep you on track and working toward fulfilling your dreams.“Successful people aren’t born that way. They become successful by establishing the habit of doing things unsuccessful people don’t like to do.” ~ William Makepeace Thackeray

Sometimes commitment is not enough. Yes, the power of commitment is all-important for realizing your dreams. But there will be times when your resolve is challenged. It could even be shattered if you’re not prepared, especially when you’re blindsided by something that knocks you off balance and seems impossible to overcome. What is the one thing that will get your commitment and resolve back online? Building Resilience!

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Kick the Power of Commitment into High Gear & Make Your Dream Come True

The unstoppable power of commitment helps you achieve your goals and achieve your dreams by reminding you of how badly you want your desired outcome. “The quality of a person’s life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor.” ~ Vince Lombardi

We often hear about the need for willpower and getting tough with yourself to create the best version of yourself. I’ve written blog posts on how you can use both of these to your advantage. However, willpower and self-discipline, by their very nature, are internal forces you use when you don’t necessarily want to do something, but you know it’s for your own good to do so. And therein lies the flaw to solely relying on willpower and self-discipline — if you don’t really want to do it, you’re NOT GOING TO DO IT! To achieve your goals and attain your dream it’s imperative to first answer the question, “How badly do I want it?” because that kicks in the awesome and unstoppable power of commitment!

Of course, willpower and self-discipline have their place. They’re handy for keeping you on track and getting you past the times when you’re feeling low or are momentarily distracted or tempted to take your eyes off of your desired outcome. They remind you of your passion and get you back in alignment with the power of your commitment. And once that happens, the distraction or temptation loses its power over you. I love how Kenneth Blanchard puts it:

There’s a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when it’s convenient. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.”

Consider this: people who excel, for example Olympic gold medalists, aren’t driven by their willpower or their self-discipline. They don’t wake up each morning and think, “I’m so looking forward to making myself do something today.” No, they’re driven by their vision of standing on the highest podium, bending their head to receive the shiny medal, as the crowd goes wild, cheering their name! They want that prize more than anything, so they’re willing to do whatever it takes to beat everyone else. That’s the power of commitment!

While it’s good to strengthen your willpower and self-discipline, it would serve you best to focus on strengthening your commitment to the few things that are truly important to you. The more committed you are to an outcome the more real it is to you, and the easier it is to choose the things that support that commitment. As Jim Rohn said, “Motivation is what gets you started. Commitment is what keeps you going.”

Maintaining your commitment is often easier when you buddy up with someone who has similar commitments.

Louise Santiago and Maria Connolly team up at Newave Leaders to inspire and assist women to bring forth the leader withinFor example, several years ago, I enrolled in a coach development program through Coaches Rising and met Louise Santiago. I’m a somatic coach, and Louise is an executive leadership coach. We quickly realized we had a deep commitment to helping women identify and bring forth their innate leadership skills to expand their world, their community, and themselves. We began a business partnership at Newave Leaders where we empower women and we lead a life-enriching annual women’s retreat. These retreats are opportunities for highly-motivated women to travel the world and explore how we can use the power of commitment to achieve the next level of growth. (If you’re interested in learning more about Newave Leaders, check out our blog, or sign up for our newsletter.) 

Working with Louise has helped me become crystal clear that intentional self-leadership is the core principle for my own coaching practice. To make intentional commitments requires that you make sense of your story, understand where you come from and what you believe, and importantly, how your emotions are showing up in your body. All these things are shaping your ability to step into the next phase of your life.

Abraham Lincoln once said, “Commitment is what transforms a promise into a reality.” What promise have you made to yourself that hasn’t become a reality yet, because you’re not quite sure how to make it happen? Please contact me and schedule an “Unlocking Your Potential” 30-minute complimentary consultation (in-person, by phone or via Skype). I love working with women who want to unleash the power of commitment in their lives.


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