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Maria Connolly, LPC Facebook Facebook Facebook

Tag: emotions

When we have a ritual, which NLP and Somatic Coaching can teach you, you can reconnect with your own inner experience embracing whatever arises within, with peaceful awareness and clear intention. Then you can fully experience and process each emotion – joy, grief, anger, amusement, pain, energy, etc. And often, you’ll discover the strength of developing and cultivating an attitude of patient, loving presence that allows the emotions to flow according to your own natural rhythm.

Deepen Your Emotional Maturity & Trust Your Feelings When Under Stress

Even with emotional maturity, there are times you don’t trust your feelings, so here’s how to consistently and positively respond to emotional stress…“Who we are is how we lead. We can either lead from heart or we can lead from hurt.” ~ Brené Brown

Often people come to me to bounce off life experiences — to either feel validated or get a reality check. They’ll say something like, “Maria, does this seem right to you? Is it okay to feel what I’m feeling?” I really appreciate being in their life this way. And I love seeing how their mindfulness deepens and adds richness to their emotional maturity over time.

Being mindfully aware of how we feel in our emotions and in our body and then making intentional choices in response is how we manifest emotional maturity. We own our feelings and the path we choose, without complaining, blaming, or making excuses.

This process of emotional growth never ends, because you experience new situations and new feelings. And your current well-being plays a huge part — what you can handle one day may seem overwhelming when you’re overly tired, undernourished or dehydrated.

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Develop Somatic Intelligence to Reconnect with Your Body and Unlock Your Potential

When you develop somatic intelligence, your mind and body will work together — no more internal conflicts, unresolved emotions, nor shattered dreams!“There’s a difference between intellect and intelligence. Noise propagates the former, silence the later. Intellect is inherited, intelligence is inherent.” ~ Drew Gerald

When I asked my friend how she was feeling, she replied, “Just fine!” Her words sounded so upbeat. But her body was saying something different. Dark, clouded eyes were downcast; mouth tense; shoulders rolled forward, almost as if they were curving over to protect her heart; hands clenching. Because of years of developing sensory acuity, I could tell she really thought everything was okay, but the dissonance with her body told another story.

As I gently inquired further, her story emerged. As she spoke, a softening of her body occurred. By the end of our lunch together, she exclaimed, “I feel so much better. I didn’t know that was bothering me so much!”

You can probably relate. Your body often knows things long before your mind catches up. It remembers today’s experiences AND all of your past experiences.

However, we’ve learned to doubt our body wisdom, to second guess ourselves, to ignore the messages that the body is sending. We spend so much time treating the body as a separate entity apart from thoughts and feelings that we create conflict and disharmony within ourselves.

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Crisis and Trauma: When the Present Collides with the Past

When you experience a current crisis and trauma from the past resurfaces because of it, it’s important to listen to what your emotions are telling you.On May 6th, 1976 right around 9pm the ground began to shake. I lived in northern Italy and I was six and a half. I was at home with my 3 year old brother and my grandma. My parents were on their way home from work.

The building we lived in shook for what felt like an eternity. I didn’t know what an earthquake was but I knew that houses were not supposed to shake. Because of her age, my grandma froze and the three of us huddled in the dark kitchen, until my father came to get us.

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Feel Your Feelings: Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Body

Is it hard to feel your feelings, after a lifetime of suppressing your emotions? Use my 4-step process to safely feel your feeling fully and productively. “We experience ourselves, our thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest. A kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us.”– Albert Einstein

Everyone is entitled to their feelings. This statement is powerful. But accepting its validity is only part of the process when you’re learning to feel your feelings. I’ve seen people cling to this piece of wisdom and not grow beyond it.

Scenario 1: They use their emotions to punish themselves. For example, their thinking goes something like this, “She hurt me. I’m entitled to feeling hurt, because everybody lets me down. Nobody loves me.” They get stuck feeling their feelings and they become overwhelmed by them, because they don’t know how to fully process them in a healthful way. And because those feelings feel so bad, they sink into depression and despair.

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Be Patient with Yourself by Mindfully Observing Without Judgment

As the crisis continues, be patient with yourself. Even if you feel like you can’t do anything, you can strengthen your patience  and come out of this a stronger person. “Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

This pandemic doesn’t seem like it’s going away any time soon. As the days turn into weeks, and the weeks turn into months, our patience may begin to run thin. Since we know this, it will be helpful to review how you can become more lovingly patient with yourself.

While you may plan to use the stay-at-home order to feverishly clean your home, write a book, or work on increasing your mastery of a new skill, you might find yourself feeling too down to do so. And that might lead you to feeling worthless or unproductive.

Now is not the time to put such undue pressure on yourself. The stress and worry of trying to make sense of these unpredictable times, is hard on us, whether we admit it or not. It can’t help but change us, as it changes the very world around us.

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