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Tag: 90-seconds

The 90 Second Secret is a technique that taps into the way the brain works and the natural processes for becoming more effective.The hormone, cortisol, is released in stressful circumstances. And it triggers the fight or flight response. But here’s the thing…cortisol only stays in your system for 90 seconds. How you react after those 90 seconds is really on you – the choices you make and your thinking process. You can ward off that emotional loop of fear, anger, frustration, by using those 90 seconds effectively.

10 Easy Ways to Boost Self-Confidence and Attain Your Dreams

Written by Maria Connolly. Posted in Life Skills.

By starting these ten simple steps that boost self-confidence, you can follow your dreams and make them come true, even when others say it can’t be done.“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.” ~ E.E. Cummings

Don’t you admire people who confidently face their fears, challenges and tragedies head-on? They have a knack for always seeing the positive, the opportunities and potential in even the most trying circumstances. Their self-confidence supports and fuels them as they follow their dreams and make them come true, even when others say it can’t be done.

Does that describe how you live your life? Even if it doesn’t at the present, there are positive steps you can take to make this your reality. Here are ten easy ways to help you boost self-confidence…

  1. Reality checks. Is it really as scary or impossible as it seems at first? Fears are often not supported by reality. You’re not going to die of embarrassment when speaking in front of a crowd. More than likely, you will create a rapport and connect with another person on a deeper level if you simply acknowledge your mistake, sincerely apologize and move on. And you can often do “impossible” things if you break the huge project down into smaller, doable steps.
  1. Surround yourself with people that are good at what you want to improve. By removing the naysayers from your life and associating with those you want to imitate, you’ll find it easier to accomplish your goals.
  1. Make confidence building a daily practice. One small change a day adds up to a new way of living. I recommend that you begin with centering practices which are foundational for making real changes in your life.
  1. Transform your inner critic into an inner coach. Be aware of your negative self-talk and replace it with positive thoughts. If you begin thinking, “This is too hard, I want to quit”, replace it with “How” questions: “How can I make this a little easier?” “How can I keep my eyes on the prize?”
  1. Keep learning new skills. Never stop learning. Whether you’re learning just enough to get by or are striving to master a new skill, your self-confidence increases as you continue to acquire new skills!
  1. Develop a “Beginner’s Mind” mindset. When you admit you don’t know everything, your mind is open to asking for help, being curious, to asking questions. You won’t compare yourself to others, because you have nothing to prove. This positions you as a learner who is filled with child-like wonder.
  1. Practice psycho-rehearsing. Visualize in great detail, every step, to accomplishing a task. Athletes do this when they imagine over and over again successfully hitting the target or making the hoop. The brain can’t tell the difference between the visualization and actually doing it.
  1. Focus on competence not perfection. Perfection is a digital on or off switch. Either you’re perfect or you’re not. Competence has five stages, so life becomes an exciting journey of discovery as you move through these stages.
  1. Develop a Compassionate Mind. Treat yourself with the same kindness, concern and support you’d show to a good friend. Mindfully acknowledging and experiencing your feelings is a core component of self-compassion. Dr. Kristin Neff provides some guided meditations and exercises that you’ll find helpful. Straightforward self-compassion boosts self-esteem more than focusing on what we’re good at.
  1. Focus on positive experiences. You are what you do. When you change what you do, you change what you are. Always act and speak in a positive way. Pour your heart and energy into kind generous actions. You’ll soon notice an increase in your self-confidence.

It is possible to reach your dreams as you achieve your full potential. Sometimes it simply takes someone holding up the lantern and lighting the way. I would be delighted if we traveled on this journey together. Contact me and let’s talk about which of my life coaching services would get you to where you want to be.

Neuroscience Unlocks the Key to Emotional Control and Business Excellence

Written by Maria Connolly. Posted in Controlling Stress, Mindfulness.

Neuroscience unlocks the key to emotional control and business excellenceHow do you feel when you see a top-performing athlete play a perfect game?  Or when a motivational speaker holds an audience in the palm of his or her hands? Or you see a husband and wife still in love after 50 years of marriage? Don’t you admire them greatly and wonder to yourself, “How do they do that? I wish I could do that. Oh sure, they were born with the gift and they’ve practiced a lot to get it right. But I could never do that.”

Why not? Why shouldn’t that be you…performing excellently in your field or creating powerful and supportive relationships that last a lifetime? “Because, Maria, I let my emotions get the better of me. My mind keeps telling me negative stories about what I can or can’t do. And there are people in my business or family life who know how to push my buttons. I just can’t seem to control what I think or say and how I react.”

I’ll let you in on a secret… These successful people know a technique that taps into the way the brain works and the natural processes for becoming more effective. Jim Fannin has made this technique famous – The 90 Second Tool™. But people have been using it for years and you can too.

Neuroscience, the study of how the brain works, has discovered three vital ways the brain functions when processing our emotional responses:

  1. Your brain is made of two hemispheres. The left hemisphere is where we process the present. The right hemisphere is for connecting to the past or to the future. (I’ll share more about how this applies to emotional processing in a future blog post.)

 

  1. Your brain believes what you think, whether it’s reality or not, if you replay it or visualize it long enough. Do you doubt me? Well, remember a time you heard a noise late at night and you thought there was a criminal in the house. The more you thought about it the more your brain believed it and made your body become defensive, the heart beat quickened, the muscles tensed, all in preparation for attack. When in truth, if you attach a true meaning to the sound – the furnace came on – you can go back to sleep.

 

  1. The hormone, cortisol, is released in stressful circumstances. And it triggers the fight or flight response. But here’s the thing…cortisol only stays in your system for 90 seconds. How you react after those 90 seconds is really on you – the choices you make and your thinking process. You can ward off that emotional loop of fear, anger, frustration, by using those 90 seconds effectively.

 

Can taking 90 seconds to calm your mind and visualize a positive outcome really make that much difference? Absolutely! Remember, your brain doesn’t know the difference between something real or imagined. What you visualize becomes its reality!

Want to change your reality by harnessing your brain’s power to create a more satisfying life? Contact me and I’ll show you how to do it, so you can excel in business and in your relationships, too.

 

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