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Tag: Positive thoughts – Negative thoughts

It’s Good to Be YOU: How to Feel Whole in a World of Conformity

It's Good to Be YOU: Here’s how you can feel whole in a world of conformity “The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” ~ Carl Gustav Jung

“You wouldn’t like me, if you knew the real me.” I couldn’t believe it when Katie, one of my clients, said this during a session! She’s a beautiful woman inside and out. Yet, she felt ugly and unlovable. Some past experiences had caused her to develop negative thoughts and feelings about herself and her worth. She’d become a master at blending in, conforming to what other people found comfortable. It took a lot of work for her to accept my words, “It’s Good to be YOU”!

We live in a society that prides itself on being open-minded and accepting of differences. It’s the subject of headlines, talk shows, movies, books. Yet why is it so necessary to call attention to it, if it really exists? If we are truly open-minded and accepting, it would be the norm, not newsworthy.

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How Complaining Rewires Your Brain for Negativity…Promote Positivity Instead!

Learn how complaining rewires your brain for negativity and how you can use this process to promote positivity in yourself and others.“It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness.” ~ Confucius

You know THAT person, the one who opens her mouth and out tumbles complaint after complaint. Chronic complainers are draining and irritating. But could someone be saying that about you? It’s possible we’re complaining and not even recognizing it!

Of course, we all complain to vent and blow off steam. And that’s a good thing, right? It’s not hurting anyone. Um…yes it might be. Not only could it be hurting your relationships, it might be modifying your brain. For a starter, let’s examine how complaining rewires your brain for negativity…

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Dealing with Disappointment — How to Renew Hope When Expectations Are Crushed

When you’re dealing with disappointment, it’s important to feel your feelings, learn from them and use them as springboards to new opportunities.“Disappointment to a noble soul is what cold water is to burning metal; it strengthens, tempers, intensifies, but never destroys it.” ~ Eliza Tabor

We are the only living organisms on this planet who build our lives around our hopes and expectations. It’s what makes us human. Without hope or expectation, we would be existing, not living. However, with these highs come the lows of disappointment, because we don’t always realize our expectations. And that makes us sad, angry or even despondent. So how are you dealing with disappointment? Could you use some tips on how to handle it a little bit better?

Whether professionally or personally, when we’re in the realm of hope and expectation, we’re dealing with things far beyond our control. We can work hard and set ourselves up for success the best we’re able, but success isn’t guaranteed. We can’t control how others will react or how situations go awry. 

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Change Your Attitude Change Your Life — You Have the Power!

The right attitude is one of the most important ingredients for personal and professional success – learn how to change your attitude, change your life…“The ship’s gone, the stores are gone…so I guess we’ll go home.” ~ Sir Ernest Shackleton, after his ship the Endurance was crushed by ice and sunk, stranding them in the Antarctic, in 1915.

Twenty months after casually speaking the above words, Shackleton and his crew did emerge from that icebound landscape. He was a genius for setting the right attitude that would enable him and his 27 men to survive 20 brutal months of isolation, deprivation and below 0˚F weather. They did so in high spirits and not a man was lost. How did they do it? What can we learn about thriving during isolation and times of uncertainty? How can you use their experience to change your attitude, change your life?

As the men left the ship, they each took 2 pounds of provisions. The captain also made sure a 12-pound banjo came along for evening concerts and sing-a-longs. After reflecting on how the crew of the Belgica — the first expedition that overwintered in the Antarctic in 1897 — went mad and perished, Shakleton learned that having the right attitude, filling each day with healthful activities and keeping a routine were essential for survival.

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Unlearn the Lessons of a Toxic Childhood — You Deserve to be Loved!

A toxic childhood teaches you many unhealthful and unhelpful lessons; and it fails to teach you the most valuable lesson — that you’re worthy of love. “An unpredictable parent is a fearsome god in the eyes of a child.” ~ Susan Forward, Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life

Do you think that love always comes with strings attached? That if someone is a winner then you’re a loser? That you need to placate everyone? That being neglected or abused verbally or physically is normal and you make excuses for it? That emotions make you vulnerable and weak? That it’s better to feel nothing? That you’re on your own?

Then it’s highly likely you’ve learned “lessons” from a toxic childhood that are neither healthful nor accurate. You didn’t deserve it. You didn’t deserve the neglect and abuse you suffered in your toxic childhood. You didn’t deserve to be ignored for days on end. You didn’t deserve the belittling and constant criticism. You were not to blame.

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