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Category: Self-Leadership Skills

How to Let Go of Hurt, Hate, Anger, and Pain & Nurture Inner Peace

Written by Maria Connolly. Posted in Change Your Life, Healthy Relationships, Self-Leadership Skills.

We feel hurt when we feel used or betrayed. Yet this suffering can stay far too long. To recover, we must learn how to let go of hurt, hate, anger and pain.“Whatever comes, let it come, what stays let stay, what goes let go.” ~ Papaji

We’ve all been hurt by another person at some time or another. We’ve all felt used, unseen or betrayed. And while this pain is normal, sometimes the suffering stays for far too long. We relive the experience over and over, and have a hard time letting go, because we’re trying to figure out what went wrong. This not only causes us to be unhappy, but can distract us from our lives, making us hesitant to open up to new things and people. We get trapped in a cycle of hurt and confusion, and miss out on the beauty of life as it happens.

It’s vital to learn to let go of the hurt, to be able to forgive, so we can move on and be present for what matters most. This is something I learned the hard way, not once but several times. Moving forward, I want to love deeply and let go more easily when the time comes.

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How to Stay Grounded in Reality – 10 Traits Grounded People Display

Written by Maria Connolly. Posted in Controlling Stress, Life Skills, Self-Leadership Skills.

Life today is so stressful, many wonder how to stay grounded in reality. If you’d like more peace, learn and practice the 10 traits grounded people display.“Let go of certainty. The opposite isn’t uncertainty. It’s openness, curiosity and a willingness to embrace paradox, rather than choose up sides. The ultimate challenge is to accept ourselves exactly as we are, but never stop trying to learn and grow.” ~ Tony Schwartz

As Beth drove to work, a car cut in front of her and nearly caused an accident. So many things were going wrong with her day. She’d spilled coffee on her shirt and had to rush and change. The thick frost on the driveway caused her to slip and fall. Was the whole day going to be one long disaster? Not at all!

Beth in one of the most grounded people I know. Because she practices mindfulness, she is completely present in the moment. Even under trying circumstances, she knows how to regain control of her mental and emotional self. She doesn’t let external forces change who she is. Would you like to be more like Beth?

Life today is so stressful, many wonder how to stay grounded in reality, when the world is falling apart around you. If you could use greater peace of mind, I invite you to learn and practice the following 10 traits grounded people display.

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Be Thankful for Setbacks in Life? You’ve GOT to be Kidding! Maybe Not…

Written by Maria Connolly. Posted in Controlling Stress, Life Skills, Self-Leadership Skills.

You can be grateful for the setbacks in life, when you use them as opportunities to learn, course correct and for developing resilience and personal growth.“If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment.” ~ Henry David Thoreau

This time of year, many people make time to enjoy family, friends and some good food, too. What I love about this time of year is that it gives me the opportunity to reflect on everything I’m grateful for, like you being part of my community. I’m also loving my new website design and excited about new upcoming projects next year. How about you? The holiday season and end of year gives everyone the opportunity to enhance your ability to be grateful for all that comes into your life — even the setbacks in life!

What!? Do you think I’m crazy to write “be grateful for ALL that comes into your life”? Is there a benefit to accepting both the “good” and “bad”? (I use the apostrophes, because it’s not helpful to label anything as good or bad, even though this is how people commonly phrase what’s presently working as opposed to what’s not working.) We can all benefit somehow from anything that happens. It just depends on how you look at it.

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Be Proud of Yourself and Unleash the Power of Small Wins

Written by Maria Connolly. Posted in Change Your Life, Self-Leadership Skills.

If you find it hard to be proud of yourself, learn how to complete your past, which includes intentionally noticing and celebrating the power of small wins.“Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else.” ~ Paulo Coelho

This may be a very uncomfortable question, but I’ve got to ask it…are you proud of the person you are today? Surprisingly many people think they’ll be proud of themselves only when they accomplish or achieve something in the future. Maybe you even think it’s wrong to be proud of yourself, because of the culture you’ve grown up in.

On a related note, have you noticed how many goals, resolutions, and aspirations are based on not liking yourself? Most New Year’s Resolutions are approached from a scarcity or lack mentality based upon negative thinking…”I’m not skinny enough; I’m not smart enough; I don’t have enough money; I don’t have the life I want to live.” This can be so discouraging! The thing you dislike about yourself can easily become an obsession that overshadows all of the wonderful things you are.

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The ABC’s of a Life Vision: from Dreaming to Achieving

Written by Maria Connolly. Posted in Change Your Life, Self-Leadership Skills.

You can use these same 6 specific steps that I consistently use to turn my dreams and life vision into an exception life – I call them my Life Vision ABC’s.“Vision is the art of seeing the invisible.” ~ Jonathan Swift

Have you ever been encouraged to put your dreams “out there” and let the Universe bring them to you? That’s a common coaching practice today. While I agree there are benefits from positive thinking, achieving your life vision is not as simple as waiting for someone or something else to deliver your dreams to you on a platter.

We can’t expect things to just happen without us having to do any hard emotional or physical work to get it. Where is the self-satisfaction and self-esteem in that? We grow as we see ourselves doing what we didn’t think was possible. (Examples of a little victory and a huge victory.)

Over time, I’ve noticed that I consistently use the same specific steps to turn my life vision into reality. I call them my Life Vision ABC’s. Be sure to give yourself plenty of creative time and space to work on this project. You won’t be able to do it justice in one day.

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